Boy, the temperatures sure have plummeted since yesterday! So maybe that's why what happened today, happened. We'll call it brain freeze.
This morning, I gave Austin a little bowl with some yarn balls and a couple of swizzle sticks (minus the sugar - that went into my tea). He always wants to "help" me with my knitting and I thought perhaps a little knitting basket of his own would divert his attention. He took it right away and began "knitting". After a few minutes, he said, "Mama show Austin how to knit", well, what knitting mama doesn't want to hear those words? So I sat down, swizzle stick in hand and tried to cast on. I say "tried" because I just couldn't. It wasn't the stick, it was me. I simply couldn't remember how to do it. The yarn felt like a stranger in my hands. At first I chuckled, and tried again. Wait, how do I hold this yarn, I know, it goes over these two fingers, but? And then the nervous laughter just became nervous. What's wrong with me, why can't I do this? The more I tried, the harder it got and the more hot prickles crawled up my spine. Within a moment or two I had convinced myself I probably had a brain tumor, dementia or something that would be swift, progressive and mean that I will never even see Austin graduate from preschool. (Such is the thought pattern of someone who has had a lifelong struggle with anxiety attacks). Then I remembered the knot. The little slip knot that starts the whole process. I made the knot, and tadaa.. it all came back. Nervously, I cast on a few stitches and off I went. I called a friend to confirm that I wasn't completely loosing it, and although she does not possess a medical degree, she says this happens to everyone, once in a while. So how about it? Has this sort of thing happened to you too?
Ok, on a different note, I love, love, love this hat! It is a silly obsession of mine to dress this little boy in the most ridiculously cute animal clothes I can. If it has ears on the hood, or a tail on the bottom, I just can't resist. I know my time is limited, he will not put up with this much longer, so I have to get my fix while I can. Girl clothes stay cute into bigger sizes, boys clothes, blah. Pirates, camouflage and little hoodlums are about all there is. So, while he may spend a few years in therapy later blaming his mama for all the silly hats, I'm still gonna be lovin' it now!